Balthazar Brokenbell: Why do female Dragonborn have boobs?

It is a question that has puzzled thaumo-anthropologists for any number years. Given that Dragonkin are lizard-like and are related to dragons, why in the seven hells do they have breasts? It’s not as if they’re mammals, it’s not like they breast feed their young so what is the point of these appendages?

Needless to say, flat out asking two-hundred pounds plus of angry, fire-breathing dragonkin about their sexual characteristics is a dangerous enterprise and people of any race can be quite reticent to talk about such things.

There were several theories about why female dragonkin were as shapely as they are prior to my investigations. Some thought that, as a magically created race, the wizard who brought them into being allowed his own desires to shape the transformative magicks that brought them into being and, being ‘typically’ male – as the Amazons would have it, could not help but give them mammalian characteristics that he found… appealing.

Some content that they were not magically created but rather were created by the gods as they are, and we should not question the will of the gods. Others that – like some life – they naturally evolved and are some sort of half-breed between lizards and mammals with the characteristics of both, somewhat like the egg-laying duck-bills of the antipodean landmass.

Given my particular ‘affliction’ and my detached viewpoint on humanoid and monstrous sexuality I was able to befriend a rather charming and friendly dragonkin by the name of Piri who, after a rapport had been set up, intimated to me the genuine nature of the dragonkin bosom.

The dragonkin bosom is a result of both convergent evolution and sexual dimorphism. The female dragonkin ‘breasts’ are, in fact, pockets in their armoured flesh, soft-lined and spacious and capable of cradling dragonkin eggs, keeping them safe and warm without the need for a nest while the female dragonkin is mobile and able to move from place to place without being tied to one place or as weighed down as a pregnant mammal. Needless to say, a nice pair of ‘egg pockets’ are attractive to dragonkin males.

The larger chest is also an aspect of sexual dimorphism in the dragonkin. The large, conic blasts of breath that we come to expect from the dragonkin are actually more of a female characteristic. Their larger chests and lungs enable them to spray their breath over a considerable area while the males tend to be able to concentrate their breath upon a smaller, more accurate area to greater effect.

A fascinating revelation for us all, I am sure.

Your servant,

Balthazar Brokenbell, Gnomish Scholar

Rules: Female dragonbreath remains the same and male dragonkin can elect to breath like that, though it’s considered effeminate. Male dragonkin can alter their breath to:

Encounter * Acid, cold, fire, lightning or poison
Minor Action Ranged Attack
Targets: One creature
Attack: Str/Con or Dex +2 Vs Reflex
Hit: 2d6+Con modifier damage. Increase to +4 bonus and 3d6 + Con modifier at 11th level, +6 and 4d6 + cons modifier at 21st level.
Special: At character generation select the ability type used and the damage type used. These remain the same for the duration of your character’s existence.

7 responses to “Balthazar Brokenbell: Why do female Dragonborn have boobs?

  1. I just read the article (this is the fourth hit after googling female dragonborn by the way). I like the eggsac explanation but…how do the eggs come out?

      • Better not giving a female dragonborn a big hug then. That gives such arkward situations. Not to mention the scary situation where a guy is oogling a female dragonborn, and suddenly a mini dragonborn pops out her boob. Kind of like alien.
        I have a very big imagination.

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